Hi there! I think that guy from your last post may have been trying to describe a monogamous triad. Like the “we” in “However, we would only have sex/date one another.” includes the third person, but they would like the third to only have sex/date the couple. Not sure if this changes your advice much but I am interested to see if it does. Thanks!

I wondered that too, but the “However,” led me to figure they meant the couple. 

My advice still stands, though: if the couple wants to invite a third party into the relationship who isn’t allowed to seek other partners, that’s a pretty big ask, especially if the original couple retains “primacy” with each other. 

Unicorns are hard to come by for a reason - it’s daunting to take on two new partners’ emotional baggage at the same time, especially people who are new to polyamory, especially people who come with a lot of rules and expectations, etc. 

“Opening up” your relationship isn’t like “opening” a door that’s being knocked on - it’s not like the world’s supply of bisexual women is waiting around for het/ish couples to invite them in. It’s more like “opening” a checking account - you’ve decided to start having a checking account, and now you have to put the work and effort in to fill it. Money is not longing to be allowed to enter your checking account; most single bisexual women are not hoping to be invited into a pre-existing relationship in this manner. (Some are, I’m sure - and if you are, let me know, because I get LOTS of asks from het/ish couples looking for just that.)