Ok I’m new to polyamory but what if a trio is driving somewhere does one person have to sit in the back and be sad??

This is without a doubt my favorite question that I’ve ever received on this blog.

Sadly, the New To Poly Welcome Packet doesn’t include one of those old-style pickup trucks with the bench seat so that everyone can sit up front - so yes, if a triad or any other poly configuration of more than two people is driving somewhere, in the interest of safety and seatbelt laws, someone’s got to sit in the back. The last thing we need as an already underserved, misunderstood minority is a reputation for unsafe and illegal road practices!

But the poly person relegated to the backseat doesn’t have to be sad! Sitting in the back means more room to sprawl out, ability to tickle the person in the passenger seat with no (immediate) repercussions (nicer people opt for shoulder massages), and an unobstructed view of the weirdos in the car behind you through the backseat window (making up funny dialogue for them is optional). I actually prefer the backseat to the shotgun seat for long drives.

Poly folk on road trips who are worried about third-wheeling the backseat rider can swap spots frequently, play car games that involve everyone, give the backseat rider DJ privileges, and keep the AC/heater on low so the person can hear the conversations up front. If someone’s feelings are really hurt about having to ride in the back, your triad might not be ready for a long road trip together.

Enjoy your poly road trip! And make sure everyone gets plenty of snuggles when you finally make it to the hotel/campsite.