I am currently in a long-distance relationship with a poly man. He and his partner just had a child, we both work busy hours. When I made the trip a few months ago to see him for the first time after becoming "official," it was an absolute let down - due to some admittedly poor planning, there wasn't time for us to actually be together. When I spoke to him about it later and I said that I felt lonely in the relationship and like the only one making an effort, he said something along the lines of "I'm sorry you feel that way, and I'm sorry how the trip went, and I'll do my best but I can't promise anything. I’m not going to be less busy for probably 18 years." This really hurt me but I tried be understanding.
While we still talk every week, I had to pull back a lot because I felt hurt. He didn't wish me a happy Valentine’s day, and when I sent him a picture of my makeup/clothes for the night, he responded in a lukewarm way, which really upset me. I feel like neither of us is making an effort right now, but his total lack of attention to me really hurts. I try to be understanding because of how busy he is with work, his partner, his children, etc., but none of this feels real and I feel so lonely – I feel truly “secondary.” Am I being selfish?
In one sense, yes, you’re being selfish, and by that I mean “focused on your own needs.” But I would argue that it’s totally okay to be selfish in this situation. It sounds like this relationship isn’t something that is making you happy and giving you the connection that you want.
To your credit, you pointed out what was bothering you. And to your partner’s credit, he was super honest in his response. He didn’t try to argue that things aren’t that bad and he pays you plenty of attention. He didn’t promise to be better about it going forward, to keep you on the hook. He was clear and realistic about what he can, and can’t, provide to you in terms of time and commitment.
Now you have information: that dating this guy makes you feel lonely and ignored. It’s time to act on this information. The guy might be great, but it sounds like this relationship just isn’t what you need right now. It’s totally fine to decide you don’t want to date a guy who is married, has a kid, lives far away from you, and can’t prioritize you in ways you want to be prioritized.